Now Available on Amazon Kindle!

"This little gem gives sound advice on building a love that lasts. Brett's hard-won wisdom jives with the latest insights from couples research. It's an easy read in a conversational style that will help anyone who is seeking to build a healthy relationship."

Susan Dutton
Foundation for a Great Marriage

Facebook   Twitter

From the introduction...

The hardest thing in life is to see things as they really are.

Sight itself is simple. It's one of the first experiences we have from the moment we're born into this world - and yet, seeing life and people and ourselves objectively, in truth, as these things really are, is the most elusive of tasks.


Our brains get in the way.

Eyeballs have an easy job, and they perform it well. They take what's there and send that picture to the brain. It's in the processing of the image that things go awry.

Standing in the desert, we see a shimmering reflection. It's sand, heat, and light that's in front of us and dutifully reported by our eyes, but our brain, feeling the deep thirst our body communicates to it, sees... water. We see what we want it to be, and not what it really is. The image becomes an optical illusion, a mirage.

And this doesn't just happen in the desert. It happens every day of our lives, no matter where we are. Our brain mismanages the information it's given and we "see" things that aren't there. Worse, we then act on the misinformation and so it begins: turbulence in, and sometimes the unraveling of, relationships and friendships due to the unnecessary drama our poor image processing brings to our lives. Or sometimes we stay too long in the wrong relationship, imagining a quality of chemistry that isn't truly there.

The hardest thing in life is to see things as they really are. This book will attempt to give you some corrective lenses, or at least work to make you aware of the screwed up relationship goggles that you have. We all do. You're not alone. And that actually makes it worse, because we're all seeing things that aren't there.

But if you know about it, maybe you can do something about it.

Let's see, shall we?